vacay and all things fireworks/disney/and messy, messy cars

there are so many pictures coming you won't even be able to believe it, especially because you're reading my blog.  one problem though...i don't have them yet.  they are currently resting comfortably in a disposable camera that we bought when we couldn't figure out which bag the real camera was in.  i have a few to tease you with in the meantime, however, so break out the popcorn and sit back and relax...well, don't get too relaxed, there really are only a few for the moment (insert nervous laugh/half smile here)...

the annual harker/married names of the female children fireworks extravaganza and when i say extravaganza i mean 3 hours of homemade mayhem thanks to a few trips to montana.  it was so fun to actually be able to be among the people in the photos that i usually just see from afar.  thanks harkers and ps if any of you fancy pants photographer cousins of mine have any pictures that actually have my son in them, please be so kind as to send them my way.  thanks a million!

it took awhile to actually get one of those little beauties (sparklers) into luke's hand, but once i did, he was hooked...or he was too busy riding his bike with the only kid that he wasn't related to. 

auntie kathleen.  my dad's little sister and apparently my kissing post.  love ya lady!

pizza with my bestest cousin (on the other side), sydney and her awesome girls.

i know what you're thinking...who's that really cute one in the middle?  samantha and elly, you are adorable for sure!

more to come folks...be sure to check back next at the same bat time and same bat channel, oh wait, that's something totally different.

saturday

can you find me?  i was there among the 20 something thousand crazies that ran from tukwila to seattle on saturday morning...by choice.  i know, there are perfectly good cars and buses, what were we thinking? 

ps you won't find me in this picture.  these are the people that have circa 2 % body fat that finished the 26.2 miles before i even finished half of that.  go person whose name i can't pronounce from kenya...woo hoo!!

oh goodness...

so...i did it...i broke the cardinal rule.  i was already feeling crummy/bummed due to a heavy mixture of rain, a child waking up at 4 am, a possibility of it being that time of the month...who knows.  anyway, the logical part of me says, "don't do it...just check your email and then go back to your book and read until sleep so mercifully sweeps you away into dreamland.  don't even start typing blogger into the search bar."  yeah, i guess the totally insane and sadistic part of me said "shove it" and went there anyway.  oh goodness, has it really been THAT long since i posted something...and has everyone else been THATawesome at updating and posting cute pictues and fancy crafty thingys?  oh goodness again...and maybe a little bit of yikes. 

one thing i can say is that i have at least been a little busy.  i know, right?  me, busy?  i actually have though.  i've begun working for my mom here at the in-home office which has made mommy mornings a little more difficult, but still doable and dare i say, a little fun?  maybe, we'll go with it for now.  i've also been training for my second half marathon.  no, no, no need for applause...okay, if you must...i topped off the training aspect of it with a brisk 10 miler on saturday...and by brisk i mean semi-long and maybe a little painful.  the race is this saturday in seattle and i just scored a new pair of these to go along with my newfound running legs.  who knew those were hiding under there...

apparently my shoes were something crazy like 2 sizes too small..."oh, is that all?"  who does that?  the answer is me i guess.  crazy.  so that numbness wasn't normal after all.  awesome.  anywho, point being that i have been filling my life with some actual cool stuff.  i have missed writing though.  i've just been in what i like to call an uncreative phase.  i may be alone in this, but sometimes i literally won't pick up a book or type on a keyboard for months at a time because i just can't get inspired.  its a bad habit i need to break, though,  because i'm always happier when i'm reading and writing and i'm pretty sure i read somewhere that its better to be happier than..."in a "phase." 

in other news, my children have been growing, quite rapidly as it turns out, so i've been trying to make a conscious effort to document it.  armed with only my iphone  (camera's broken and new camera fund made its way into a mini van...sad but true), i've captured these precious gems.  enjoy, and thanks again for being a pal.  i know i haven't said it to you all personally, but i feel it and i'm grateful.

the zoo, the park, mcdonald's in the rain...all in a day's work

sofi loves her some honda odyssey...who could blame her?

milestone

 I won't go into details...but just suffice it to say that about a month and a half ago, luke FINALLY received one of these:

and one of these:

and maybe one of these:

feel free to sing his praises.  i know i am, along with the men that so dutifully take care of our garbage recollection once a week (namely my husband and those other guys)...yay luke!!

i just thought i'd throw this picture in for good measure.  yes, that is sofi's first haircut and yes, she is absolutely thrilled about it. 

moments of the day

so i'm not sure if this is going to be a weekly occurence, but i couldn't let the sun go down until i shared these "precious moments."  seriously, sofi was totally stuck like that and instead of sympathy and saving the poor, wimpering soul, i ran for my camera and snapped this little gem.  sure love these little dudes.

mother's day

regrettably, i had to stay home with the littlest sprout on mother's day due to fever and all around crankiness (sofi was sick too) so i wasn't able to attend church as they celebrated the madre.  i guess luke didn't think that singing to the rest of the moms was kosher, so he cried instead.  sofi and i were treated with a much needed nap and downtime until luke came home and handed me this:

yeah, i'm still tearing up.  i know its cliche and i know you all know already, but isn't it really moments like this that magically make you forget their long, long...long road to potty training, the toys spread all over the floor right after you clean it, the food you have to practically force down them, yadi yadi yada...

needless to say, it made my day.  heck, it made my entire 3 1/2 years that the  boy's been alive and living under my same roof.  i love that kid even though he doesn't quite understand how much.  i know i haven't made much of myself as far as the world is concerned, but i'm really starting to realize how much more his world matters.  a belated happy mom's day to all you lovely mothers out there.  you're beautiful, wonderful, and even though your concerts may not be selling out to millions, its the late night impromptu singing of twinkle, twinkle little star and itsy bitsy spider that really make a life worthwhile. 

yes, i still am channeling dr. phil apparently.  happy mom's day ladies. 

to make a long story even longer...

so consider me riddled, yes riddled with guilt.  i decided to make an april resolution to blog/write in my manuscript every week. 

enter my good buddy failure. 

sheesh.  so, instead of throwing myself a giant pity party (which are good if you need an excuse to have cake) i'm deciding to make an end of april/almost may resolution.  i need to take more pictures/videos of my little dudes because, well, they won't be this little for very long...

side story--the other day i was driving home from a preschool open house and upon recollection of what transpired while talking with the teacher, i began to sob...well, maybe not sob, but there were some definite tears.  i realized that besides a few trips, i have not been without luke from sun up (sometimes even earlier) to sun down (sometimes even later).  i knew, of course, that i want him to go....that it is the best thing for both of our sanity and overall good nature, but preschool?  really?  luckily, i have another slightly smaller version of him to keep me company when i think that i can drop everything and do whatever i want...aka move to italy for four months just to eat a lot of carbs and learn italian--oh wait, that was the chick that's being played by julia roberts in eat, pray, love...sheesh.  maybe i'll just eat the carbs and call it good...

anywho, i need to document our lives better minus the whining and the incessant need for recognition.

another side stlory/apology--sorry for my previous outburst.  i honestly don't want to make any of you feel obligated to praise me religously.  you should practice your religion religously, however...the angst really sprang from insecurities with myself and the fact that i'm pretty nervous about actually buckling down and writing a book.  i was looking for immediate gratification which, i know now, was way too immediate.  so sorry again and really, thanks for reading anyway.  just read, enjoy, comment if you want (or have the time between feeding children or yourself and sleeping or working of course), but don't feel like suicide will invade my thoughts if you don't. 

thank you

as for previously promised pictures...wow, did not do that sweet alliteration on purpose...they are currently on my camera which is, you guessed it, broken.  just call me the woman who is not meant to photograph.  its sad really.  i finally remembered to bring it along, which was a feat in itself, when previously mentioned smaller version of luke grabbed it and proceeded to introduce it to the ground in a not so gentle manner.  sigh...the pictures are safe on the sd card luckily, but blah blah blah they're not in my hot little hand at this moment.  so, wait again in anticipation and i will be back shortly...hopefully...soon.

ps i tried to add a little video for viewing pleasure here at the end, but the little icon is mia.  does anyone know how to upload a video these days?  yes, consider me the neanderthal of blogging. 

hi

i'm done whining...just thought you all should know...and i have pictures coming. 

thank you :)

this is me blushing

so, i was a dork and took my post about my book off the blog in a moment of what i thought was self-enlightenment...or something else that doesn't make any sense. 

its back.

thanks to all those who have left me sweet messages. 

i'm sorry  i'm sensitive.

apparently, i was a little quick to judge everyone.  looking back now, it was just a bad monday, full of rain, poop, and bickering.  my bad.

can we just pretend i'm still cool and that i don't overreact when my hormones take over the small, but present logical side of me? 

i mean, can you really say no to this face?

or this one

or even this one

discouraged:

to deprive of courage, hope, or confidence; dishearten; dispirit.

 mama said there'd be days like this, right?  ha! now you're all singing the song in your heads.  my work here is done.  kidding...anyway, the last couple of days have not been on my list of top 5 "i'm so glad i woke up this morning" days.  the rain isn't exactly awesome, but a few other factore have contributed as well.  lets just say that i have a tiny flair for the dramatic and when i decided to let you all in on the slow but steady writing process that i've immersed myself in, i imagined an overwhelming response of adulation and encouragement.  comment after comment of atta-boys and way to go's etc...i waited...and waited.  my sweet husband let me know that maybe everyone is just busy and the post was a little long after all  yadi yadi yada.  yeah, in my current state, lets just say i didn't really take his word for it. 

i became discouraged.  enter my longtime friend: self-doubt.  which, of course, in turn, led me to question my ability as a mother, as a wife, as a writer.  i've struggled and questioned and possibly cried, but now, as i sit here in the wee hours of the morning (thanks to a nightmare brought on by a missing train...not mine...this time) i can really reflect on how truly blessed i am and recognize that its not outside praise that i need.  i may want it, but i can't expect things outside of my control to go my way.  so, in a nutshell--for now, i'm going to keep things a little simpler.  i'll try and be witty (its a stretch i know), and put up pictures of my little dudes, and not expect you all to be my guinea pigs.  kapiche?  no, i'm not itallian, but it always sounded good when uncle jesse said it on full house.

when did dr. phil inhabit my body?  enough with the pity party.  thanks for reading.  it really does make me happy...and happiness beats discouragement anyday.

ps thank you heidi and adam for what you DID say.  it meant a lot and didn't go unnoticed.  i'm not a complete prima donna :)  gracias

your first glimpse

once again...its been too long since i've allowed you all a peek into the nuttiness that is the life of tara sutton.  i decided that its time to share a little of what will someday hopefully be a deseret book bestseller.  yes, i'm starting in the mormon world because, to be completely honest, the new york times bestseller list is a bit daunting...and when i say a bit, i mean the scariest thing i could possibly imagine.  someday, tara, someday.  that might be what i tell myself on a daily, maybe hourly basis.  anyway, this is the beginning of the book that will chronicle the life and times of sister thomas, onetime missionary to the spaniards.  i hope you enjoy it and if you don't, keep it to yourself because i can't take negative criticism.  i'm joking.  please tell me what you think and if any of you happen to be a publisher in disguise, let me know what my first advance will be!  without further ado...

If wishes were fishes, we’d all have a fry. That is apparently something that my grandma on my mother’s side used to say while she was still among the living. To this day, none of us are really sure what it means. What fish? Who are all these people and is it really our collective desire to fry up hundreds of pounds of fish together? The truth is that it really has nothing to do with fish. It really has to do with the fact that if everything we wanted came as easily as fish apparently did back in the day, none of us would be left with a care in the world.


All human beings do have desires. We all have wishes that we hope either would or would have come true at some point in our lives. My desire was to become a missionary, but not just any missionary. I was going to be the first missionary in the history of missionarydom, to not waste even a single moment of the Lord’s time while I figured out what I was doing. I found out pretty quickly that my desire, albeit righteous, was not the most practical, nor was it humanly possible.

We’re all put on this earth for a reason. We’ve known that since primary. The Lord put us here at a certain time with a certain mission. We all have a certain amount of years to learn as much as we can and do as much as we can for others, while striving to share the wonderful gift we all know as the gospel. I discovered, a little late, that a mission is a mini-lifetime. The main difference being that the amount of time allotted is not a mystery. Newborn babies do not have the ability, or the desire, to crawl let alone run marathon in record speed. I discovered that the same goes for a “greenie” or a new missionary. Just like the Lord does not expect a brand new baby to be able to give a speech or translate ancient texts, He does not expect a new sister or elder to baptize a hundred people, while fully understanding the rules and co-mingling perfectly with another human being 24/7.

well, there you go.  i hope i won't regret posting that since i just remembered that it will appear on facebook to be seen by all the millions of people that wait breathlessly for my status updates to appear. 

ps i went with mombo and the kids to visit one of my favorite people who happened to spawn one on my, and luke's, now favorite little person this week and we did this:

for those of you that know larissa and, of course, for you larissa.  this was a recipe she posted on her blog.  hers was a little prettier...and again, when i say a little prettier i mean that hers could have been published in marha stewart living, but it was tasty and yes, we both had seconds and possibly thirds.

camille-you rule.  sawyer-you will marry my daughter someday.  love you guys

the good, the bad, and the...really girly?

good news:  after years of convincing, (not by me, no...by his desire for a better golf game) my husband actually got online and signed up for a gym membership all by himself

better news:  we've actually gone almost every day

bad news:  i caught him doing several pull ups to the tune of mariah carey's dreamlover...

they grow up so fast

this fine morning around 6:35 (the time has no significance, i just thought you should all know how early my kids like to be awake at my expense) sofi was blissfully polishing off her first yogurt of the day when the cat walked in.  this, of course, is an everyday occurence and nothing to shake a stick at, (what does that mean anyway?) but it seemed to have illicited an unprecedented response from the little lady.  something that sounded a lot like kitty...and along with uh-oh, mama, and what grandpa firmly believes to be his name, her vocabulary is rounded out.  aka she's a genius.  just thought you might all want to know, so that one day, when she receives the nobel prize, you won't be surprised.  you're welcome in advance. 

do they really go from THIS to THIS in a matter of a year?  ps those are stickers that happen to adorn her hair and body.  luke so lovingly decorated her after receiving them in sunbeams.  oh, the love. 

its that time of year...

need i say more?

sigh

so, i guess when i said i was coming and that i was going to write once a week--i really meant that i wouldn't write until 3 weeks later.  apparently blogger has even changed their format in my absence.  oh goodness, one of these days i will be held accountable to myself somehow.  as of right now, though, i'm completely overwhelmed with teething, crying, snot, potty training and the endlessless thereof, the ever-pressing question of where i will be in 6 months, why i can't seem to write anything unless its 4 in the morning when i really don't feel like being anywhere but a bed...etc...

are you sure you wanted to know what i've been up to? 

in reality, my situation is no where near as bad as those in say, haiti, but i guess that's the main reason that i haven't updated in a while.  i've been bummed and worried and traveling to exotic places like grants pass, or and nampa, id--all things that i didn't qualify as big news.  i haven't wanted to complain in light of all the yuckiness that is going on elsewhere in the world.  i really am blessed and i am aware of my blessings...i've just been lost inside my own pity party.  why do we throw those for ourselves anyway?  who wants a pity party?  the truth is, i don't and i don't want to invite any of you either.  there, that's my excuse for being absent--told in a long, really drawn out, frustrating sort of way.

in other and much happier news...sofi turned 1!  and i actually did document it.  which reminds me of another reason i'm having trouble being consistent.  i'm annoyed with my lack of photography skills.  i'm planning on taking a class this summer, but for now i feel like my pictures look dumb so i don't take many...yes, it is as juvenile as it sounds.  i'll give myself a good talking to later i promise.  in the meantime.  here's a glance into the festivities of a girl that loves food more than life and isn't afraid to ruin a perfectly good cake.  gotta love her.

i'm having technical difficulties with the video of her in the actual devouring stage, but i'll figure it out and trust me, its worth the wait. thanks for listening and i'll be back sooner than later.  i mean, the sun is out in the middle of february and this happens on a nightly basis.  what is there to sulk about?  answer:  potty training. 

dangit!

i'm coming

i just wanted to let you all know that i started writing a blog that was swirling around in my head as i was up with sofi from 3-5 am this morning, but when i read it back, i sounded like a big whiner...so i'm coming up with something else. also, my (late) new year's resolution is to write at least once a week, both in this blog and in my book that just might surface within the next 5 years. i have started it and for those of you that loyally check up on me, you might just get a glimpse of it every once in awhile. we'll see how brave i'm feeling at the time. if it happens to be at 3:30 in the morning, i'm usually pretty brave, or maybe just sleep-deprived. the point is there is more to come. i know i've said this before, but this time i mean it. i know i stepped right out of a b-movie action flick with that last line, but what can you do? be patient...it is a virtue after all.

here's a little parting gift to whet your appetite:

gotta love a litte blackmail.

ps the "other" baby is this trifecta is my friend camille's baby, sawyer. i love how sofi's arm is just resting on his shoulder like they've been hangin out

twas the night before insanity

she may look cute, but don't let that precious face fool you...she was the closest thing to evil that i've ever experienced in my life last night. let me just fill you in on the specifics:

6:30 pm-went to bed like a champ

7:00 pm-woke up when luke entered the room

7:30-could be heard making unhappy noises through the door, but reluctantly gave in to slumber

10:00-screaming like her life depended on it. dad succombed to the temptation, brought her in to get some grub and returned her to sleeping bliss...or not

11:00-decided that screaming was better than sleeping again and was taken permanently out of luke's room so as not to force him into her world of awakeness.

1:30-apparently she's only just begun...woke up screaming yet again and mom tried to let her "self-soothe" for about 20 minutes. yeah, there was no soothing happening...self or not. she just kept screaming until finally falling asleep on mom's chest downstairs.

3:30-are you kidding me?? after waking up the whole house, the little tike was given a blessing and sleep ensued, right? well, for a couple more hours anyway.

7:00 am-is it morning? the sun's not up and i feel like a mac truck mistook my head for the freeway...

9:00 am-yeah, so church didn't happen and the sof-meister and i got some much needed (so much needed shut-eye) until luke's return that brought with it a rousing rendition of "jesus wants me for a sunbeam."

oh, what a night...

feliz navidad...or natal depending on if you're spanish or portuguese

...are any of you spanish or portuguese? you get the idea. well, this is definitly my favorite time of year and i needed to commemorate it sometime. what better day, than the big day itself? merry christmas to all you wonderful loyal listeners (readers) out there. thanks for dropping by every once in a while. it truly does make me feel special. i hope you have a wonderful christmas and an even more fabulous new year. feel free to keep checkin in on us. you just might be the first to know when my book is done, when andy's business has made its first million, and when luke has succeeded in collecting the percy train from the vast (extremely vast, you have no idea) world of thomas and friends.

merry christmas!!

...from the house of the photogenic, yet camera shy sutton children and their parents

some memorable moments from the sutton/thomas family christmas:

party rewind

so its been a couple months since the little dude turned the ripe old age of 3, but my computer was on a hiatus from picture uploading until now...so, (drum roll) here they are. its like you're right there in the middle of the pumpkin patch, isn't it?

ps that's siobahn, posing like a supermodel by the cake that spawned from her glorious imagination.