Saturday, May 1, 2010

to make a long story even longer...

so consider me riddled, yes riddled with guilt.  i decided to make an april resolution to blog/write in my manuscript every week. 

enter my good buddy failure. 

sheesh.  so, instead of throwing myself a giant pity party (which are good if you need an excuse to have cake) i'm deciding to make an end of april/almost may resolution.  i need to take more pictures/videos of my little dudes because, well, they won't be this little for very long...

side story--the other day i was driving home from a preschool open house and upon recollection of what transpired while talking with the teacher, i began to sob...well, maybe not sob, but there were some definite tears.  i realized that besides a few trips, i have not been without luke from sun up (sometimes even earlier) to sun down (sometimes even later).  i knew, of course, that i want him to go....that it is the best thing for both of our sanity and overall good nature, but preschool?  really?  luckily, i have another slightly smaller version of him to keep me company when i think that i can drop everything and do whatever i want...aka move to italy for four months just to eat a lot of carbs and learn italian--oh wait, that was the chick that's being played by julia roberts in eat, pray, love...sheesh.  maybe i'll just eat the carbs and call it good...

anywho, i need to document our lives better minus the whining and the incessant need for recognition.

another side stlory/apology--sorry for my previous outburst.  i honestly don't want to make any of you feel obligated to praise me religously.  you should practice your religion religously, however...the angst really sprang from insecurities with myself and the fact that i'm pretty nervous about actually buckling down and writing a book.  i was looking for immediate gratification which, i know now, was way too immediate.  so sorry again and really, thanks for reading anyway.  just read, enjoy, comment if you want (or have the time between feeding children or yourself and sleeping or working of course), but don't feel like suicide will invade my thoughts if you don't. 

thank you

as for previously promised pictures...wow, did not do that sweet alliteration on purpose...they are currently on my camera which is, you guessed it, broken.  just call me the woman who is not meant to photograph.  its sad really.  i finally remembered to bring it along, which was a feat in itself, when previously mentioned smaller version of luke grabbed it and proceeded to introduce it to the ground in a not so gentle manner.  sigh...the pictures are safe on the sd card luckily, but blah blah blah they're not in my hot little hand at this moment.  so, wait again in anticipation and i will be back shortly...hopefully...soon.

ps i tried to add a little video for viewing pleasure here at the end, but the little icon is mia.  does anyone know how to upload a video these days?  yes, consider me the neanderthal of blogging. 

6 comments:

adamf said...

Love. It. My fellow emo friend.

I'm going to comment on like every post, until it starts annoying you, and you're all like, "Dude, like, stop commenting so much, I can't handle all this recognition.

McCain Family said...

I like you, Tara. IS Luke really getting old enough to consider pre-school? That must be weeeiiirrrd. And bitter sweet. You can have alone time with Sofi but you will miss the little dude. Good luck!

Love ya!

Andi Kate, Children's Author said...

video assistance: blogger is lame with videos most of the time. check out youtube and import the html. way better all round!

Mindy and Benjamin said...

t-dog. you are funny. i will see you soon.

Heidi Dyk said...

It is weird/difficult thinking of your baby going to school, isn't it? I promise you it will get easier and you may even enjoy the break! Heehee!

Kristi said...

I thought I would be so sad sending my little guy off to preschool, but it was great! Of course, the first week I stayed by the phone the whole time just in case they were going to call, but after that I really started to look forward to his days of preschool. Now he's in kindergarten, Nicole is in preschool (just finishing her second year of it) and I wish more than anything that I could fake Tori's birth certificate and get her into preschool early. Alas, I'm not that good with falsifying government documents.